Let me share an embarrassing secret. Sometimes I think I may be slightly psychic. A neurologist would probably have great explanations for all the little moments in life when you think to yourself, “Sam is going to comment on the state of my silverware drawer.” Only to have Sam comment on the state of my silverware drawer half an hour later.
Usually these are tame, everyday scenarios that can probably be chalked up to intuition born from my predilection towards observation and emotional intelligence. However, occasionally we know more than we let ourselves realize.
Summer Mix 2010 is the year my mixes became prescient. Shortly after leaving school, I was heading to Breckenridge, CO, for a week of hiking, drinking, and researching graduate schools. After Breckenridge, I had a scholarship to spend 6 weeks in Lublin, Poland, learning Polish.
While I had a full summer ahead of me, I left one thing out of my plans… the guy I was seeing. Even my summer mix knew that our relationship was over before I did.
In the Air Tonight – Phil Collins
Rabbit Heart (Raise it Up) – Florence + the Machine
Heads Will Roll – Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Harden My Heart – Quarterflash
Sweet Girl – Fleetwood Mac
Elevator Love Letter – Stars
My Eyes – Dr. Horrible’s Sing-a-long Blog
This Too Shall Pass – Ok Go
Audience – Cold War Kids
Telephone – Lady Gaga
Am I Here Yet (Return to Sender) – Billie Myers
Lookin’ For a Good Time – Lady Antebellum
Never Going Back Again – Fleetwood Mac
Same in Any Language – I Nine
She Moves in Her Own Way – The Kooks
What About Everything – Carbon Leaf
257 Weeks – Nine Days
Ice Monster – Minus the Bear
I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For – U2
Just Around the Riverbend – Pocahontas
Don’t Stop Believing – Journey
He did everything boyfriends are supposed to do. He brought a bottle of wine over on Bachelor Mondays. He brought me Starbucks when I was studying. He made a pretty legit choose your own adventure Valentine’s Day date. He took me to all the trivia nights with dollar margarita deals. In return, I was a pretty awesome, considerate girlfriend.
Our relationship was perfect… the perfect example of a nice, lackluster relationship that goes on for far too long because there’s no real reason to end it.
But by summer, I was ready. I was ready to go abroad and have “more.” I wanted to learn more, see more, experience more, feel more. I didn’t want to be tied down anymore. From ”Telephone,” “Never Going Back Again,” and “257 Weeks” my message for that summer is clear: Leave me alone to do my thing and find my feet.
We broke up shortly after I went home for the summer. I had a stressful last week after finals, involving a mix up with student housing that led to random maintenance people entering my dorm room (at the end of an isolated, empty hallway) at all hours. When I finally got home, he accused me of seeing someone else because my last.fm page showed I’d been listening to “So Happy I Can Die” by Lady Gaga. He gave me an ultimatum to reinvest in the relationship, and I decided I didn’t like ultimatums.
(And, yes, when Quarterflash’s “Harden My Heart” made the summer mix list, I should’ve realized there were flashing neon lights screaming “BREAK UP!”)
Looking over my summer mix now, it perfectly describes everything up until July 4, 2010. As I took that night flight out of O’Hare, I looked down at the fireworks below and envisioned the experience ahead. In Poland I stopped all the searching because I’d found something I needed, something that would bring me back to the country next year—piwo z sokiem.
Kidding. I love piwo, but I discovered more than that. Adventure, challenge, tradition, culture, family, friendship, connection, and more.
2010 Musical Highlights:
It’d be easier to mention songs on the mix that don’t qualify as a musical highlight. Since I’ve already established this section, I’ll focus on “What About Everything” and “Sweet Girl” as the two top songs that maybe not everyone knows and that I would share without embarrassment!